I’m 22 years old, not in a relationship and I don’t have any kids yet so I’m just asking out of curiosity.

  • Christian A@beehaw.org
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    1 year ago

    I’ve not got kids yet so not really helpful to your question. But I’ve seen enough of parents who just give their kids tablets and smartphones (Unfortunately in a couple examples I know, it’s because they can’t be bothered to parent). Not only do the kids end up getting hooked on the devices, but the content they’re consuming is… worrying.

    It’s enough that my partner and I have already spoken about how we will try to raise ours. I don’t think complete isolation from tech is the answer, it can be a great learning tool after all.

    But I’m going to make sure I use it with them in the earlier stages of life. They won’t just have their own devices, and they won’t be able to use it all the time. We’re going to promote reading and other activities, being outside, crafts etc - If they show an interest in STEM/STEAM stuff that’s cool, and tech can be used here - but it doesn’t have to be connected to the internet all the time. I can build little hobby electronics with them, we can set up Raspberry Pi’s, we can create stuff in software and even play games like Minecraft. But together, and in moderation.

    Obviously we won’t be forcing them to only use tech with us, or watching over them super strict later on - but for the earlier parts of life? You can be sure their introduction to technology will be more than “Here’s a tablet, go play games and stop being a bother”

    • Naate@beehaw.org
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      1 year ago

      This is more or less exactly what we did with our kiddo. We had time limits and strict control when she was little. Then moved into similar time limits and a looser “over-the-shoulder” monitoring plus a monitoring app that we’d sort of look at monthly. Now she’s a teen with her own phone (13 when she got it, and it was my old device), an iPad, and a gaming pc. Time limits are sort of out the window now, and the monitoring app is more or less useless. But we do still have a tech curfew for everything except Spotify and offline creative endeavors.

      She was 100% a part of the decision-making and understood the role of the “nanny” software. It’s always been a major point to discuss these things with her, and explain “why” at every step of the process. She’s also pretty sharp when it comes to identifying harmful things, and even comes to us when she stumbles across a potentially questionable video or something.

      Open two-way communication has always been important and a focus in all of these issues. I grew up with conservative totalitarian parents, and learned how to lie and be sneaky just to be myself. I don’t want that for her, and while I know we’ve screwed up along the way (who doesn’t?), she seems a lot healthier than I was at her age.

      • Christian A@beehaw.org
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        1 year ago

        This sounds the perfect way to do it, well done. Two-way communication is key, I hope I can do it similar.

        • Naate@beehaw.org
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          1 year ago

          It’s not easy, that’s for sure. Communication is always important, but what works for one kid may not work for another. Hopefully it continues well as she enters high school!

          Good luck with your own in the future!