(picture only spiritually related to topic)

Not sure if this is the best place for this, but is there any good alternatives out there for the standard windows office apps (Word, PowerPoint, Excel, etc)

And I’m not talking about Libre Office or OpenOffice or the other copyright-respecting ones. I’m asking for one that will let me do everything Word/PowerPoint/Excel/Photoshop can do, but on Linux, without running wine or dosbox. Especially all the tiny little fiddly things they’ve copyrighted.

Stg, Microsoft must have read that comic where the Joker tried to copyright fish and thought that was a great idea.